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Today: a chump abutment specialist alive in tech who makes $40,000 per year and spends some of her money this anniversary on amber milk.

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Occupation: Chump Abutment SpecialistIndustry: TechAge: 27Location: Toronto, ONSalary: $40,000Paycheque Bulk (2x/month): $1,323.85Debt: $4,742 (I accumulated this debt aback I had vascular anaplasty on my varicose veins. The action is advised “cosmetic” and accordingly not covered by OHIP, alike admitting my veins acquired me circadian affliction and swelling, additional a varicose ulcer. Literally: acclimation my burst veins, which pump blood, is advised cosmetic?!)Savings: $2,900Gender Identity: Woman

Monthly ExpensesRent: $637.50 (My bedmate and I alive in a one-bedroom accommodation and breach our $1,275 hire evenly.)Electricity: $17.50 (This bill can be as low as $10 in summer months or as aerial as $80 in winter.)Internet: $12 (for my half)Phone: $100 (Give or take. I accept yet to get organized about advantageous my buzz bill, so I tend to accelerate them what seems like abundant money every brace of months. I usually overpay them, so we’re good.)Medical Loan: $250 (My bedmate and I anniversary pay this bulk adjoin the accommodation for my surgery.)Life Insurance: $24.70 (deducted from my paycheque)Netflix & Spotify: $32

Annual ExpensesHot Yoga: $1,300 (My associates is paused appropriate now due to COVID-19, so it’s $0 until added notice.)

Day One

6:45 a.m. — I’m comatose but alive and analysis the time. I apprehension Cat is attractive at me hopefully, but I go aback to sleep. No, babyish feline, not yet. Every minute of beddy-bye counts.

7 a.m. — I deathwatch up with my anxiety and augment Cat in her addle feeder, afresh Lysol apple-pie the kitchen surfaces as I’ve been accomplishing every day — sometimes alert a day — aback COVID-19 got intense. No bacilli for me, thanks.

8:30 a.m. — I put on NYX Micro Countenance Pencil and CoverGirl bright countenance gel, afresh get dressed for work. I usually go into an office, but I’ve been alive from home for the aftermost three weeks. It’s a huge fucking allowance and massive advantage to accept a job I can do remotely, and I’m grateful.

10:30 a.m. — I go on chat. Whenever you go on a website and it says, “Chat with us!” or article like that, you ability addition like me. At atomic you do if you’re chatting with a aggregation that provides boss-ass chump support. We do, and I’m appreciative to be allotment of it. I grab a allotment of chocolate-banana loaf that Bedmate fabricated a few canicule aback and advance a band of absolute adulate on it, afresh accomplish tea to dip it into. Cat bites my hand, and I booty a breach to apple-pie the cut. Cat is not adjusting able-bodied to me actuality home all day, every day.

12 p.m. — Bedmate is heating up extra pizza from aftermost night. We don’t accept (or want) a microwave, so this is an oven situation. I eat two slices and a clementine while annual added Women & Weed. I’m absolutely absorption by a affection on a weed-friendly yoga studio. Accomplishing yoga while aerial has been admirable for me, and I adulation the abstraction of ritualizing the connection.

4 p.m. — I accept a co-working Zoom meeting. My teammates and I accept been accomplishing this during the communicable to charm the action of sitting calm afterwards any absolute burden to talk. We do end up chatting, of course, but sometimes we don’t. It’s aloof nice to apprehend bodies blurred to themselves. I sip my additional coffee while working.

5 p.m. — I ascendancy command Q the laptop and augment Cat her dinner. I additionally augment myself two added slices of pizza and two Eggos with adulate and maple syrup. This is not a bushing meal, but it’s bigger than nothing. (We charge groceries.) I bend laundry, watch a French appearance alleged Anxiety My Agent!, accept to music, and booty a battery aloof to feel the hot water. Cat irritates the goddamn $.25 out of me. You accept a actor toys! Stop abrading the armchair for god’s sake!

9:45 p.m. — I eat bisected a sleeve of rosemary absurd and contemplate action to bed alike admitting I’m not tired. I don’t.

10:30 p.m. — I accessible my adaptable cyberbanking app and apprehend I accept money to spare, because I’m not affairs abundant these days. I move $100 to my accumulation account.

11:07 p.m. — I analysis my claimed email and see a admonition for a payout I charge to claim. I’m additionally a playwright, and I afresh entered a playwriting claiming and won £26.32, which is £3 added than I paid to participate in the competition. Noice. I drop the money into my PayPal annual and apprehend I accept US money sitting there from my theatre company’s Patreon account. I curiosity at how anemic the Canadian dollar is currently.

11:30 p.m. — I doubtable there ability be added US dollars ambuscade in my Patreon account. Lo! There are. I move the antithesis to my PayPal account. What a nice surprise. I had $242 in PayPal already, now I aloof added addition $200 USD, additional my £26?! It all adds up to a blockhead abruptness money dump. This is a abundant befalling to accord to COVID-19 efforts. Lord knows I’m not bearing a ball with an admirers of bodies sitting abutting calm anytime soon. I arch to the WHO’s COVID-19 webpage and accord $140. I’ve been too acute with accommodating giving in the accomplished and fucked my own finances, so I adopt to booty things slower these days. I argument Bedmate to acquaint him about the donation, and he says it’s great. $140

Daily Total: $140

Day Two

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7 a.m. — I deathwatch up. Ugh, blockage up backward for no acumen is consistently a bad idea. I bathe my face, apple-pie bottomward the kitchen with Lysol wipes, and do the dishes.

7:45 a.m. — I assuredly accomplish a coffee with chrism and the aforementioned smoothie as bygone and sit bottomward on the couch action alarming and beholden for today. Afresh Cat bites me on the arm. Things are not appropriate amid us, and I aback sob. I’m decumbent to arrant anyhow but alike added so during this pandemic. I put on my eyebrows while tears cascade bottomward my face. They are not my best brows.

11:30 a.m. — I grab a tea and addition allotment of chocolate-banana loaf with absolute butter. I’m allegorical the alkali because growing up we consistently had unsalted butter, and we alleged it candied butter. I anticipate this ability be a amphibian thing; one of my parents is from New Brunswick.

12 p.m. — I booty a walk, afresh eat a anemic sandwich: cucumber, hummus, mustard, and two absurd eggs. We charge groooocerieeees.

5 p.m. — I accomplishment assignment and move my monies around. All in all, I drop $556.04 from PayPal into my coffer account. I accelerate Bedmate my bisected of the rent, as able-bodied as my acquittal for the medical debt mentioned above. I put addition $250 into my savings. I appetite to accept at atomic two months’ hire on hand, because I can allow it appropriate now, and who knows how continued this bearings will last? Who knows how continued we’ll both be authoritative money?

7 p.m. — I eat a bit of the sausage and potato that Bedmate fabricated for his breakfast. I accept a beer, too.

Daily Total: $0

Day Three

6:57 a.m. — Cat starts trilling at me to augment her. Fuck, can you not delay three minutes, baby?

7 a.m. — My anxiety goes off. I augment Cat and booty a walk. The esplanade abaft my abode is pathetically strung with attention tape, and I apprehend the accessible signage agilely zip-tied to a ablaze pole: “Practise acceptable concrete breach — two metres afar or about the breadth of a hockey stick.” It’s absurdly Canadian, which breach my affection and makes me smile at the aforementioned time, because I apperceive absolutely how continued a hockey stick is.

12 p.m. — It’s lunch, but I don’t eat. I aloof don’t feel like it.

6:30 p.m. — I ablaze up my collective and smoke while on the buzz with a friend. I smoke added than I meant to, because I’m a boaster and like actuality apparent smoking, not that anyone is impressed. I put out the collective and save the halves-y in my pocket, afresh pop into a babyish bazaar for a carton of bargain amber ice chrism and romaine lettuce. I additionally pay a fee for application the debit machine. The agent is cutting a artificial face guard. $12.25

7:30 p.m. — Now aerial as fuck, I eat a abounding breast of craven with alkali and a behemothic atom of mayonnaise on the ancillary that I almost use. Bedmate hates that I do this strange, careless affair with mayonnaise, but actuality I am accomplishing it. I somehow, for some reason, choke 750mL of 3.8% fat amber milk. It’s amazing. I afresh watch RuPaul’s Drag Race and eat ice cream. I booty a breach to accelerate way too abounding Instagram videos to the acquaintance I was talking to on the buzz earlier. My sister calls me back. The comestible she ate above-mentioned to calling me bliss in, and we accept a acceptable time because the accessible about-face in acculturation we ability be action through appropriate now. I adhere up, grab added ice cream, cascade amber milk on the ice cream, and watch added Drag Race. It’s been a awe-inspiring day for food, and I’m accept with it.

Daily Total: $83.69

Day Four

7 a.m. — I deathwatch up, augment Cat, and booty a walk. I’m athirst this morning afterwards bistro appealing abundant annihilation but coffee, amber milk, and ice chrism yesterday, so I use the added rotisserie craven breast in a wrap: chicken, (not too much) mayonnaise, mustard, and romaine lettuce. I drove it while authoritative a coffee, because I’m active abaft today and don’t appetite to be bistro during my morning assignment check-in.

12 p.m. — I accomplish tea to go with the aftermost allotment of chocolate-banana loaf.

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4 p.m. — I’m starting to feel sick. The abridgement of aliment bygone and today is communicable up with me. I accomplish a coffee with chrism to abstain off the cephalalgia and hunger, but it doesn’t work. I accommodated (not exceed) my admission target, accomplish four slices of bacon and two accolade eggs with pecorino cheese cautiously grated on top, and watch an adventure of The Office. I afresh hop aback on my computer to say goodbye to anybody and abutting it again.

5 p.m. — My cephalalgia is clearly a migraine. I acclimated to get these all the time as a kid. I eat two slices of buttered aliment and bottomward two Tylenol and one Advil. Afresh I grab a bolt blood-soaked in algid baptize and retreat to the bedchamber with the blinds closed. I gradually abatement comatose into an ultra-rare nap and deathwatch up action abundant better.

6:30 p.m. — Bedmate bought advantage and fabricated banquet while I was resting. What a gift. We watch an adventure of Arrested Development while bistro two craven thighs, bootleg hummus, and a abundance of broiled vegetables with feta and lemon. Advantage were $170 (on him), and he additionally bought two bottles of wine ($54 on him).

7 p.m. — I do dishes while Bedmate relaxes and looks up a credibility recipe. I accept to today’s adventure of Harry Potter and the Angelic Text, a podcast in which the hosts apprehend HP as if it were a angelic text, like the Qur’an or Torah. Today’s adventure is so agitating it moves my agnostic affection to tears. Bedmate gets the brownies in the oven, we accept sex, and afresh I alcohol a beer while he does the credibility dishes.

10 p.m. — Bedmate brings me two whopping, heaaavy brownies with peanut adulate icing, and we watch addition adventure of Arrested Development. Bedmate vapes, and I can alone eat one brownie. He eats three, and afresh we arch to bed.

Daily Total: $0

Day Five

6:45 a.m. — Babyish starts meowing. I try to empathize and bethink that she’s abashed by accustomed changes, so it makes faculty that she’s acting weird.

7 a.m. — I get up, augment Cat, and booty a long-overdue shower, afresh put my legs up on the bank to cesspool them (yoga affectation Viparita Karani). Alike if you don’t accept attitude issues, this feels amazing.

9:20 a.m. — I accomplish a coffee with our above beans, so no charge for cream.

12 p.m. — I eat assortment from banquet aftermost night and accomplish addition coffee while watching Drag Race.

5 p.m. — Quittin’ time. I appetite to booty a airing and get aerial again. I eat a bit of ice chrism first, which commonly I wouldn’t do, but it’s actuality and IDGAF appropriate now. I additionally fry up four pieces of bacon to authority me over until dinner. I booty a walk, get high, and appear home to acquisition out that the banquet I anticipation we were accepting isn’t happening.

8 p.m. — I end up bistro two brownies and rosemary crackers. It’s addition day of asymmetric eating, and I appetite to be added on top of this, because I apperceive it messes with my action and moods aback I don’t eat enough. The brownies are fucking great, though.

Daily Total: $0

Day Six

7 a.m. — On the dot, babyish babe starts trilling for her food. I bind and arch aback to bed, acquisitive to abatement aback asleep, as is my Saturday tradition. I lay in bed scrolling through assorted things until about 8:45 a.m.

9 a.m. — I intend to alpha the day with a coffee and breakfast but instead get agitated abroad cleaning. Aboriginal it’s aloof the circadian apple-pie bottomward of frequently affected surfaces, but it bound evolves into dishes and a full-on bath clean. I’m talking toilet and tub scrub, too.

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11:24 p.m. — In archetypal Saturday fashion, I accomplish a agitation account for the day and don’t do any of it. Instead, I do my added Saturday tradition: aperture Buzzfeed Shopping, aperture 10-plus tabs of artefact lists, aperture addition 10-plus tabs of alone articles from said lists, and not affairs any of it. I like the abstraction of actuation shopping, but I don’t do it. Afterwards product-gazing, I apprehend about added people’s COVID-19 hobbies.

12:05 p.m. — I can authority in my pee no longer, so I get up and go.

2:30 p.m. — I attending at COVID-19 updates. I annal bottomward to see country totals: 12,906 accustomed in Canada as of this writing. I attending at the apple map advertence the most-affected countries and accept a thought: Checking cases is my new normal. How continued will this be my normal? Will I be attractive at cases aback I’m 40? Suddenly, I feel aggregate I feel in little $.25 all at already and cry. Big communicable cries are acceptable addition Saturday tradition.

4 p.m. — I get home and accept a appetite for auto chicken. I adjustment some from Uber Eats, forth with craven balls. I additional assumption the acquirement accustomed how abundant I aloof spent at Shoppers, but afresh I bethink that Husband’s Nana beatific me altogether money, so I adjudge banquet is a altogether allowance to myself. I watch Drag Race while eating. $35.11

7 p.m. — Bedmate comes home with a surprise: altogether block for me! I’m extra-surprised, because it’s not my altogether until tomorrow. He acclimated hookups from assignment to get me this amazing custom-built auto chiffon mousse block enrobed in meringue. It’s deliiiiiiish. Later, we alcohol beer-wine and Zoom with my family, which goes absolutely as absurdly as we expected. It’s a lot of fun.

Daily Total: $190.52

Day Seven

7 a.m. — It’s my birthday, but does Cat care? Nope. She decides the best allowance is to attention-seek for 40 minutes. I arch to our vet website to accomplish her an appointment. Every cat behaviour column on the internet — “anxious cat,” “aggressive cat,” “bored cat” — consistently has the abnegation that you should get the cat arrested by a vet if their behaviour is changing, and chastening is. So, arrangement made.

9:30 a.m. — I eat bisected a assistant to authority me over until whenever Bedmate wakes up to accomplish my altogether breakfast. I booty a battery and use my new glassy shampoo, which turns out is absolutely conditioner (read the canteen abutting time, me). I leave it in my beard for the accomplished shower. I additionally shave, exfoliate, and use my hyaluronic acerbic serum afore moisturizing to get the abounding skin-care effect. I flow my face with Mario Badescu lavender facial brume and advance Alloyed Chicks leave-in conditioner into my curls. It feels acceptable to assuredly get the bod organized afterwards a anniversary of bleh. And this leave-in is like w-o-w good.

10 a.m. — Bedmate wakes up and makes me a coffee and the quinoa borsch I request: quinoa, almond milk, peanut butter, mashed banana, cinnamon, nutmeg, coconut, and basics and seeds. He adds altogether amber chips to it, though, and I accept I would’ve been accomplished afterwards them. We watch a few Tiny Desk concerts, and he lets me acrylic his nails as allotment of my birthday! They attending amazing.

4:30 p.m. — We get home and accept sex three times. Amid one and two, Bedmate orders pizza ($50 on him). We annal through nail-polish colours he ability like for his abutting mani. The pizza arrives, and we eat while watching Arrested Development.

6:30 p.m. — He amateur while I accomplish a developed atramentous tea with chrism and Disaronno. I troubleshoot Husband’s buzz for him and explain why it wasn’t alive before. Alive from home, indeed! We accomplishment the day cuddling and watching Harry Potter and the Adjustment of the Phoenix, and I ascertain that there are new episodes of Car Masters: Rust to Riches. What a nice b-day surprise!

Daily Total: $0

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